Tag Archives: Christian family

Why I’m Sticking with My Husband

3 Sep

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So I was getting ready to write a post about healthy eating, but I felt the need to go in a different direction. 🙂  I just finished a book for new brides and married women, but I’m waiting till the end of September to release it after I attend a writing conference in a few weeks in case I get any more pointers.

It seems to be wedding season, and I’ve recently gone to lots of beautiful weddings of both friends and family.  My husband and I just made eight years of marriage this year, and at almost ten years, I feel like we finally know each other, and I pretty much know what he’s thinking even if he doesn’t speak.  We’ve been through the newlywed growing pains, kids, job changes, expectations that were and weren’t met, and dealt with both good times and bad times.  I think back to my wedding and how I wanted the day to be just perfect, not realizing that the wedding day would go by so fast, and then I actually had to know how to live with and get along with this new person 24/7.  🙂

So if I could share anything about marriage with married people, whether newlyweds, singles, or those who have been married, it would be this.

  1. Your spouse doesn’t complete you.  If you were happy before them, you’ll be happy after them.  If you were sad before marriage, you’ll be sad after marriage. Getting married won’t complete you – you should find wholeness in Christ.  Putting the expectation on your spouse of making you happy isn’t fair.  Marriage will teach you about yourself and refine you, but nowhere in the Bible does it say that your spouse is meant to complete you.
  2. Choose your battles wisely.  Some (small) things – you just have to let go.  I kind of look at it the same way that I look at my employees.  If they do something wrong, I try not tell them right then, and micromanage.  If it’s something I need to go over, I’ll make a note of it and tell them the next day.  I don’t want them to feel like I’m a dragon breathing down their necks!  🙂  ….same with my husband.  If there’s something we need to confront, I’ll do my best to ask myself if I’ve added to the problem, if it’s a good time to discuss it with him, if it’s a large issue that needs to be confronted, or if it’s just something small that annoys me that I really don’t need to be upset about at all.
  3. The grass isn’t greener on the other side.  With the recent Ashley Madison scandal, it really became obvious to me that a lot of people are looking for satisfaction outside of their marriage – I am not judging them b/c we have all made mistakes, I’m just saying that it made me think.  My thing is, if I’ve already invested eight years into my marriage and have children and home, I’m going to fight to make my marriage work.  I married a wonderful man.  Yes; we have our differing opinions sometimes, but so does every couple – no two people are exactly alike.  Instead of going out and cheating, I would rather try and work things out with my husband, build our marriage, spend time as a family, and work on things that need to be sorted out.  I have no intentions of ever leaving my husband, but just for rhetorical purposes, if I did, the new person might have some qualities that my husband didn’t have, but my husband would still have things the new person didn’t have.  Why start over?  No one person is ever going to meet your needs 100% of the time – stick with the person God gave you, make your marriage better, and enjoy the spouse that God blessed you with! 🙂  (I am not speaking to issues of abuse or cheating – I am speaking to those who have good spouses but are considering wandering..)

I could go on so I think I’ll do a part two and keep going to till the book comes out.  🙂  Stick with the partner of your youth that God blessed you with!  If you are thinking of straying, think of what attracted you to your spouse to begin with.  Light the fire again!  🙂  Get help if need be, get off the blogs that showcase perfect marriages, talk to real people who have good marriages, read marriage books, and try and put yourself in your partner’s shoes.

I wanted to share this Hillsong worship song “I Surrender” with you all – it’s about surrendering to God in every area!

Blessings,

Lauren

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Lauren is a wife, mother, Jesus-lover, Blogger, Certified Life Coach, Professor, the owner of a Spanish Immersion Christian preschool, and the owner of Lauren’s Lathers, an organic beauty company, (making her own home-made Soaps, Scrubs, Shea Butters, and more!)  She is excited to soon be starting her Professional/Master Esthetics Certification Program this Fall to eventually open a spa for women that will offer a variety of Spa Treatments for the whole woman – (Microderm, facials, waxing, makeup, massage, spray tans, etc.) along with Life Coaching.  She loves Zumba, Pilates, soaking worship, dreaming and goal-setting, the beach, chocolate, berry smoothies, travel, and spending time with her friends, family and children.  Her life’s mission is to be happy, to help others, and to spread God’s love, as well as to be an Author, Motivational speaker, Consultant and Coach – her first book will be available soon at the end of September.  : )

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What if my gift is too small?

17 Jun

International Kids 2

Image courtesy of http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/

With social media, TV, and Facebook, we often see amazing stories of people who are breaking Olympic records, traveling to other countries helping sex-trafficked women and children, and winning all kinds of awards.  Sometimes we are happy for them.  Other times it can make us feel as though we should be doing more.

But we should never compare our gifts to others.  Recently a friend told me about a trip she was taking across the world to help abused women.  I could have been jealous, wishing that I too could travel internationally and make a difference.  But I know that for me, I am making a difference right at home. 🙂

 

Right now, my mission is to make a difference right here in my city by loving my children and the children who come to my preschool.

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Right now, my mission is to love my husband and friends, and be an example to others that marriage still works.  🙂

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Let’s never compare ourselves to others and think that the gifts we can share with others are “too small.”  Not at all. 🙂 Our gifts are just different.  Some gifts may bring fame and fortune, and other gifts may not, but that doesn’t make one better than the other.

Be happy with the gifts that you can share with others.  What is a gift that you can share with others today? : )

 

 

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Lauren is a wife, mother, preschool teacher, tutor and lover of all things natural, even making and selling her own organic beauty products.  She loves Zumba, the beach, coffee, chocolate, berry smoothies, travel, and being silly with her friends, family and children.  Her life’s mission is to be happy, to help others, and to spread God’s love.

 

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