Tag Archives: Christian marriage

Why I’m Sticking with My Husband

3 Sep

easter 1

So I was getting ready to write a post about healthy eating, but I felt the need to go in a different direction. 🙂  I just finished a book for new brides and married women, but I’m waiting till the end of September to release it after I attend a writing conference in a few weeks in case I get any more pointers.

It seems to be wedding season, and I’ve recently gone to lots of beautiful weddings of both friends and family.  My husband and I just made eight years of marriage this year, and at almost ten years, I feel like we finally know each other, and I pretty much know what he’s thinking even if he doesn’t speak.  We’ve been through the newlywed growing pains, kids, job changes, expectations that were and weren’t met, and dealt with both good times and bad times.  I think back to my wedding and how I wanted the day to be just perfect, not realizing that the wedding day would go by so fast, and then I actually had to know how to live with and get along with this new person 24/7.  🙂

So if I could share anything about marriage with married people, whether newlyweds, singles, or those who have been married, it would be this.

  1. Your spouse doesn’t complete you.  If you were happy before them, you’ll be happy after them.  If you were sad before marriage, you’ll be sad after marriage. Getting married won’t complete you – you should find wholeness in Christ.  Putting the expectation on your spouse of making you happy isn’t fair.  Marriage will teach you about yourself and refine you, but nowhere in the Bible does it say that your spouse is meant to complete you.
  2. Choose your battles wisely.  Some (small) things – you just have to let go.  I kind of look at it the same way that I look at my employees.  If they do something wrong, I try not tell them right then, and micromanage.  If it’s something I need to go over, I’ll make a note of it and tell them the next day.  I don’t want them to feel like I’m a dragon breathing down their necks!  🙂  ….same with my husband.  If there’s something we need to confront, I’ll do my best to ask myself if I’ve added to the problem, if it’s a good time to discuss it with him, if it’s a large issue that needs to be confronted, or if it’s just something small that annoys me that I really don’t need to be upset about at all.
  3. The grass isn’t greener on the other side.  With the recent Ashley Madison scandal, it really became obvious to me that a lot of people are looking for satisfaction outside of their marriage – I am not judging them b/c we have all made mistakes, I’m just saying that it made me think.  My thing is, if I’ve already invested eight years into my marriage and have children and home, I’m going to fight to make my marriage work.  I married a wonderful man.  Yes; we have our differing opinions sometimes, but so does every couple – no two people are exactly alike.  Instead of going out and cheating, I would rather try and work things out with my husband, build our marriage, spend time as a family, and work on things that need to be sorted out.  I have no intentions of ever leaving my husband, but just for rhetorical purposes, if I did, the new person might have some qualities that my husband didn’t have, but my husband would still have things the new person didn’t have.  Why start over?  No one person is ever going to meet your needs 100% of the time – stick with the person God gave you, make your marriage better, and enjoy the spouse that God blessed you with! 🙂  (I am not speaking to issues of abuse or cheating – I am speaking to those who have good spouses but are considering wandering..)

I could go on so I think I’ll do a part two and keep going to till the book comes out.  🙂  Stick with the partner of your youth that God blessed you with!  If you are thinking of straying, think of what attracted you to your spouse to begin with.  Light the fire again!  🙂  Get help if need be, get off the blogs that showcase perfect marriages, talk to real people who have good marriages, read marriage books, and try and put yourself in your partner’s shoes.

I wanted to share this Hillsong worship song “I Surrender” with you all – it’s about surrendering to God in every area!

Blessings,

Lauren

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Lauren is a wife, mother, Jesus-lover, Blogger, Certified Life Coach, Professor, the owner of a Spanish Immersion Christian preschool, and the owner of Lauren’s Lathers, an organic beauty company, (making her own home-made Soaps, Scrubs, Shea Butters, and more!)  She is excited to soon be starting her Professional/Master Esthetics Certification Program this Fall to eventually open a spa for women that will offer a variety of Spa Treatments for the whole woman – (Microderm, facials, waxing, makeup, massage, spray tans, etc.) along with Life Coaching.  She loves Zumba, Pilates, soaking worship, dreaming and goal-setting, the beach, chocolate, berry smoothies, travel, and spending time with her friends, family and children.  Her life’s mission is to be happy, to help others, and to spread God’s love, as well as to be an Author, Motivational speaker, Consultant and Coach – her first book will be available soon at the end of September.  : )

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Just left a wedding…now I want to get married again!

24 Mar

Every time I go to a wedding, it reminds me of my own almost six years ago.

It also makes me want to relive my magical day, (with the same guy of course!) 🙂

Today I went to my friend’s wedding, and it was sooo much fun!

I think the groom was crying at the beginning, (which I always love,) 🙂  and at the end, we had a full fledged worship service!

I love how the bride and groom looked into each other’s eyes, like they were so ready to spend the rest of their lives together.

It made me think back to when I had just met my husband, and became giddy when the phone wrang, and it was him…to the times when just holding his hand brought goosebumps to my arm.

Although we have been married for a few years, I still love being around him, and spending alone time with him.  🙂

In fact, tomorrow I have a surprise date planned for him, and I know that he will love it!

So no matter if you’re a newlywed or have been married for 40 years, keep the romance alive!  Cook him a special dinner, light some candles, get a sitter, or just cuddle under some blankets after the kids are asleep and watch a funny movie!

Let’s not let the newlyweds be the only ones who are happily married – re-ignite that passion!! 🙂

You’re officially invited to a fashion show/beauty bash/amazing lunch….

For more information, please visit the events pages below!

https://www.facebook.com/#!/events/424589357632345/?fref=ts

http://www.successcoachingandtutoring.com/March-Beauty-Bash-and-Lunch.html

***We are giving away a free spot at our March Beauty Bash, Fashion Show, and Lunch – to qualify, please leave a comment on this post on what beauty means to you!

If you like this post, feel free to follow my blog or to “like” my fan page below.

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Loving-Life/378787838834868

And watch my videos here if you like:

https://lholmes79.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/check-out-my-cool-videos-collection-at-lockerz/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oRdKMth_eE

***Want to become a better wife, or to prepare for marriage, (regardless of whether you’re single, engaged, dating, or divorced?) Get signed up for my “Brides in Training” class – I’m enrolling now, and it’s for EVERY woman regardless of marital status – for more info, leave a message in the contact section of my website below!   🙂   It’s a fun and interactive class that can be taken in person, via Skype, online, or over the phone. Wisdom, fun, and lots of laughs are guaranteed!

http://www.successcoachingandtutoring.com/Brides-in-Training-Coaching.html

Love pretty jewelry? ME TOO!! Check out my Traci Lynn Fashion Jewelry page – our jewelry is cute, professional, fun, and has that BLING factor that we all love!

http://www.tracilynnjewelry.net/laurenholmes

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